Wax-leaf begonias are often used in borders or planters to add a colorful accent to yards, berms, or parks and are very hardy in sun or shade and can even tolerate cold to hot temperatures. So why don’t I like them?
One morning on my drive into work, from a distance, my eyes caught this beautiful display of red, pink, and white flowers bordering the entrance to a golf course. It was a resplendent show of colors and greenery! I was looking for flowers to plant in my mostly shady yard and these would be perfect. As I came closer and past the colorful arrangement, I was able to see that they were wax-leafed begonias. Really? “But I don’t like those flowers!”, I recall saying in my head, full of disbelief and disappointment. Why didn’t I like them when they were exactly what would make my yard look amazing?
I started to reflect on how we all have things we like/dislike and have no real reason for it other than we just do. And that’s ok (to a point). But what happens when we dislike something that might actually be good, NOT for us, but for the good of the whole. Those flowers, whether I liked them or not, would really give my yard that pop of color and beauty I would enjoy. So why wouldn’t I just plant them and get over my dislike for them. Next summer, I will, and it might feel weird for me at first to have them in my yard but I’m sure I will revel in the beauty they’ll bring to my shady yard.
I started to think about our work in education and looked for examples of this dissonance in our everyday work or interactions. Does it matter whether we like the curriculum that was purchased, the technology apps students use, the life science unit, flexible seating purchased for classrooms, STEM labs in our library space, the disheveled teacher whose student growth is through the roof, the new teacher who chose to not have a desk in her room, the colleague that’s engaging students differently in learning? In all of these examples, the focus shouldn’t be on our likes/dislikes but on the outcomes! Do our students benefit/grow/achieve in their learning because of these things? Can we learn something from it? Then get over it! It’s not a matter of liking, it’s a matter of putting kids learning first, participating in the outcome, serving others above ourselves, being open minded. Covey would say this is thinking Win-Win. What would happen if we moved past approval or disapproval TO acceptance, curiosity, and trying? We all would benefit and grow. Isn’t that the outcome we all want in the end?
I caught myself thinking in this way and I’m raising this to your attention. Stop. Think Win-Win. Try it! No one needs to know you like it or not, they just need to know you are behind them, supporting them. That’s what matters.
Hello wax-leaf begonias!